New Evidence Shows Paul Bunyan Used Old Faithful as Bidet

New evidence from archaeologists studying Yellowstone have discovered that Old Faithful, a natural geyser visited by millions of tourists every year, was originally created by Paul Bunyan as a bidet.

“We all know that Paul Buyan cared about his cleanliness, the man would not shut up about how clean his buttocks was. To the point where it became uncomfortable to have a conversation with him according to historic texts.” Dr. Dungleberry an archaeologist from Yale commented to the press. 

“We were trying to carbon date some nearby rocks when we discovered that it wasn’t a rock after all, it was a giant piece of two hundred year shit.” Dr. Dungleberry explained the discovery to a crowd at Yellowstone on Thursday. “It should have been more obvious to us because of all the undigested corn.”

Yellowstone has contemplated on renaming the geyser to something more related to the new finding. A commission will decide later next week on if the park will be changing the geyser’s name to “Old Poop Terminator 5000”.

“For years we thought the geyser smelt like sulfur because of the high amounts of sulfur erupting in the area, but we now know it's because of Paul Bunyan's stinky ass!” Dr, Dungleberry answered when responding to the question. “Oh my God! What's that smell? Smells like someone shit their pants!” Dr. Dungleberry concluded the conference with a quick run to the mens room.